You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
