oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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