we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Are we still banned from the library?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize