now i know why i became what i already was.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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