I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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