Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
