Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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