I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
