Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
