I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
