Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
