So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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