My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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