found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
