How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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