but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
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