My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm passing your future prison.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
