just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
