i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
