end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
