Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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