Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
