I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize