you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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