i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize