there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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