and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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