ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
