It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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