capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
