yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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