my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
