i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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