I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
