So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize