it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize