soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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