Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
