I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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