you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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