I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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