I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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