I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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