Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
