I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
soo... how was my night?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
