i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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