We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
