When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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