you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
