Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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