I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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