Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
